Y’all this jumped right at me this morning, even though I’m a smidgen older than 30s or 40s (insert wink and nudge here.) Seriously, this is an excellent read for those of us with fire in our hearts that the devil just keeps dumping a bucket slam-full of ice water onto! Thank you Beth Moore!!
I tried to read the Christmas story yesterday. Not the one about the BB gun. The one about Jesus being born in a manger. From Luke chapter two. I say “tried” because it took three attempts for me to get through it.
It’s such a beautiful story to me, and I wanted to hear it old-school, King James, “And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger” because that’s how I learned it so many years ago. And maybe it’s because I know the ending, but I just got overcome with emotion at the thought that God Himself would leave the safety and beauty of heaven to come in such a low and meager way. For me.
After several tissues and raised-eyebrow looks from my husband, I finished reading. Y’all, I felt like I’d been to church!! My heart was full, and I felt cleansed and new. And a little raw.
Still this morning, I am overcome with the joy of the Lord after a blessed Christmas Day with some of my family. I’ve read the story again this morning, sans tears and snot, and I am struck by the thought that the sweet baby in a manger is where a lot of people keep Jesus. They love the Virgin Mary kneeling over the manger of hay, full of Emmanuel, God With Us, Christmas-card perfect halo glowing around His head… But they never let the Prince of Peace grow up!
As I write, I’m hearing music in my head. New words. New music. I need to get this written down, but for now I hear a chorus that goes something like:
Don’t leave Him there, tender and small!
Don’t keep Him stuck in a manger, tiny and helpless and new.
Let Him grow up into your heart
and bring all the Love that His Father sent Him to bring for you.
Jesus did not die on a cross so that we could drink egg nog, watch movies, and spend ourselves into bankruptcy. True, our Lord loved a party and even turned water into wine at a wedding reception! But that tiny Baby in a manger came that we might have LIFE, and have it more abundantly.
The beautiful thing about our Savior is that, just like the wise men, we can bring him our gifts… The best that we have, whatever it may be… And it’s enough. And if all we have is water, He will turn it into the best wine imaginable.
He is born!!!
When you’re head over heels in love, you make a fool of yourself sometimes. May I ever be foolish for Jesus, because he is nuts about ME!!
Who loves you?
No, seriously. Who in your life do you know, without a doubt, loves YOU? Even when they don’t want to love you? Even when you’re being difficult? Even when you wouldn’t blame them if they didn’t love you? Even when you don’t want them to love you because you’re too mad at them right now?
Who loves you anyway? Isn’t it amazing what a little word can do to a question? Anyway. Despite all your “stuff.” Regardless of the pain you’ve caused. Even though you don’t deserve it. Unconditionally. Who loves you anyway? By now, I know that a name or two or six has popped into your brain. Thank them. Tell them how much you appreciate them for hanging in there with you and loving you in spite of everything.
Have you ever pushed someone away on purpose? Maybe fear set in, and you wanted…
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As the cows come through the gate into the neighbor’s pasture outside my studio window, I can barely see their dark bulk against the gray sky. Slowly, heads hung low, they move out into the field. I watch through the rain-pocked window, thankful to be in here and not out there.
And then I think that, often, the presence of God is much like what I’ve just observed through my window.
My world is dark and gray, it’s raining in my heart, and God comes in… slow and steady. Massive and silent. Impervious to whatever storm is going on my life, the Lord moves into the field of my pain or heartache or sickness and settles there. Quietly. No fanfare.
Its just that, sometimes, I haven’t noticed that He’s there, because I’m too focused on the rain. Or the pain. Or both.
Let us become more aware of your presence
Let us experience the glory of your goodness
I woke up this morning with Francesca Battistelli singing this bit of lyric in my head from her song, Holy Spirit. And I know that this is what I want… To be more aware of God’s presence. To feel his warmth and BIGness in the middle of my pain. And maybe sit down beside Him, so that He shelters me from the wind and rain of doubt or fear.
Another beautiful sunrise through these barn doors this morning! God is such an awesome Artist!!!!!
The sunrise was beautiful this morning. When I woke up, the color was just creeping into the sky. When I looked out the kitchen window, I saw the sunlight starting to wake up the world behind the barn on our neighbors farm. The coolest thing is that the barn doors are open so the light from behind was shining through. The picture is grainy, but maybe you can see it.
It got me thinking… The light of God is like that sunlight shining in our lives. It warms and fills everything it touches! Our job, as Christians, is to have our barn doors open so the light can shine through us. We can’t save it all for ourselves and keep it locked inside. We must throw open the doors and windows of our hearts so that God’s love can shine through us and touch others.
In the same…
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Before I bring my need
I will bring my heart
Before I lift my cares
I will lift my arms
I wanna know You
I wanna find You
In every season
In every moment
Before I bring my need
I will bring my heart
And seek You
Lauren Daigle’s voice woke me up at 3:30 this morning singing these words from her song, First. How often do I go boldy before the throne of God with a laundry list of my needs and wants? Sometimes we use prayer like a drive-thru at McDonalds… We give God our order and drive away with a bag of forgiveness and a side of grace riding shotgun and feel like we’ve done our prayer thing for the day! To quote the apostle Paul, “may it never be!” (Romans 3:4)
The way I see it, God doesn’t want my list anyway. He knows what I need already! What He desperately wants is my heart. Me. My self. My soul and spirit. My body and mind. ALL OF ME. In relationship with Him. See, that’s the beautiful thing about the heart of our God… He is never going to force us to come to Him. I can choose to follow my own path, doing my thing, and hoping everything works out. Or I can follow the One who created me, who knows how I work, the One who wrote the manual.
So this morning, even though my heart is heavy and full of burden for people I love and care about, I’m not starting there. I’m sitting here in my nightgown with my coffee and my hands lifted high, offering my heart to God. (In between sentences. 😉) It’s His already, my heart, and I know that He will take good care of it. He can fix it when it breaks. He won’t ever lose it or misplace it. My heart is precious to Him. It’s in good hands.
I am NOT ready for Fall. Autumn. That beautiful season of the year, at least in our part of the world, when God paints His creation in gorgeous golds and oranges and reds, and the temperatures drop enough that I pull on a sweater or jacket. I am NOT ready to put away my flip flops and shorts. I am NOT ready for short days and long nights… for Halloween decorations or planning Thanksgiving dinner. But ready or not, here it comes! It’s Fall, y’all!!
What AM I ready for?? Birthdays for my Dad and three of my grandchildren are in the Fall. Making pumpkin pie and pumpkin roll for my family. Frost killing off the ragweed is high on the list. Riding my bike in cooler weather means longer distances and gorgeous scenery. Mums. A fire in the evening to take the chill out of the air because we don’t want to turn on the heat yet. The whole family and more coming together around several tables at Thanksgiving. It’s mayhem and I love every minute of it… Just not the planning part ;).
The song in my head this morning is Kristian Stanfill’s Even So Come.
Like a bride waiting for her groom
We’ll be a Church ready for You
Every heart longing for our King
Even so come
Lord Jesus, come
Since I was a kid, I’ve been playing and singing Jesus Is Coming Soon, an old southern gospel song. Forty years later I am still waiting. But I’m ready!! I gave my heart to Jesus a long time ago, and I have tried to serve Him the best way I know how through the years. Sometimes I got it right. Sometimes I didn’t. But we have walked this journey together, usually with Him carrying me!! I have longed for the day when I see His precious face. I may not be ready for cold weather or the holidays, but I AM ready for You, Lord. And until that day, use me. Make me an instrument of Your peace. Even if I have to wear a jacket to do it.
Even so come, Lord Jesus.
My back is jello. WAS jello… until Dr. K. fixed it through two different spine surgeries within 18 months. Discs have been replaced, arthritis cleaned out, scoliosis straightened up, a broken vertebrae pinned down… He did a fabulous job! Three years later, I can do almost anything I want and I don’t think much about my back at all except to respect the weightlifting limits, and to “listen” to the signals I get from my spine.
But last week, one of my worst fears was realized. I fell. I’m not a runner and never was. I have been a walker, but it’s not my favorite activity. While I go to the gym because it’s necessary, I’m not a gym rat. My husband, on the other hand, is a charter member of our gym and should have a gold key! No… For me it’s the sheer joy of riding my bike in the outdoors. Struggling up the hills, and coasting down them with the wind in my face and the sun on my back. For a little while, everything is right with the world. I’ve been working on building my stamina and endurance, and had doubled my miles.
But I fell. In my own yard. I hadn’t even sat down good on my seat yet! I prepped like always, took off like always, but the grass was wet and the wheels slipped to the right. I fell left… Onto my left side. The good news is that I fell into the grass and not the gravel. The bad news is that I broke a rib. The shoulder and clavicle are just bruised and sore. I will be fine, but I had no clue how painful a broken rib could be!!
But isn’t that the way it is for all of us?? We are going along in our lives, doing what we always do the same way we always do it, and then we slip. We fall. We hit a slick spot on our journey and our spiritual and emotional wheels slide out from under us. We find ourselves careening toward the hard ground at an alarming rate with no way to stop ourselves, knowing it’s going to hurt when we finally land.
We’re all broken but we’re all in this together
God knows we stumble and fall
And He so loved the world He sent His son to save us all
These lyrics from Matt Maher’s song, And All The People Said Amen, were singing over me when I woke up this morning. It’s funny… When I fell off my bike, I laid there in the wet grass on my back doing a body check. The first thing I thought about was my back and how falling is NOT an option for me. I made sure all the parts of me were still moving and not in pain… Feet and legs? Check. Arms and hands? Check. Neck okay? Yes, I can turn my head both directions without pain. But I couldn’t get up. The wind had been knocked out of me and that rib pain was searing through my side. I’m thankful and grateful for soft grass instead of gravel. That someone was there to help me up. That I was in my own yard rather than out on the road several miles from home.
God knows we are going to fall sometimes. But He so loved this world that He sent His only Son to save us, if we believe. When we crash and hit the ground, Jesus is there to pick us up. Maybe the big thing is to fall INTO the arms of our Savior, and let Him catch us. It’s a much softer landing than the cruel hard ground of the world. He will lift us back to our feet, brush us off, heal our wounds, and bring us back to Himself.
And all the people said Amen
And all the people said Amen
Give thanks to the Lord for His love never ends
And all the people said AMEN!!
Maybe it’s the artist in me, but I LOVE COLOR!!! In everything… walls, dishes, clothes, sunsets, flowers… God has created the most beautiful colors imaginable, and some I’m sure we cannot imagine and will only realize when we reach our heavenly home. But this morning, I’m stuck on red. Blood red.
All night long, The Lord was singing the same words over me. I have a broken rib from a bike wreck last week (another story for another time) so I’m not sleeping well these days. Every time I woke to turn over or get comfortable, Chris Tomlin’s song At The Cross (Love Ran Red) was singing through my head. And it won’t stop.
At the cross
At the cross
I surrender my life
I’m in awe of You, I’m in awe of You
Where Your love ran red
And my sin washed white
I owe all to You, I owe all to You
My love can run blue if I’m lonely. Or yellow if I’m happy and silly. Or white when the momma bear comes out in me. And even pink and red when my husband is around. But Jesus’ love is that deep, dark blood-red. The red that flowed from his sides. The blood-red that flowed from his hands and feet as He hung on the cross. The red that mingled with His sweat as He waited for His Father to end His agony and take Him home.
And because His love ran red, my sin is washed white as snow. I am made pure and perfect in the goodness and grace of God’s son. A blinding white… A white that blocks out everything except the One who gave Himself up for me.
And I am forever changed. And forever grateful.