I woke up late this morning. It was one of those nights when I didn’t feel well, didn’t sleep well, and every time I woke up I had a different song in my head. Maybe the songs were keeping me awake! Regardless, this morning when I finally did get up, these lyrics were constant and on repeat in my brain.
But I listen to the sound of Jesus singing over me.
And the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, “Do not be afraid!”
And the voice of truth says, “This is for My glory”
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I would choose to listen and believe the voice of truth
This is an older Casting Crowns song, and it begins with
Oh what I would do to have
The kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I’m in
On to the crashing waves
That’s where I am right now. In a boat that feels like it’s supporting me, but it’s taken on leaks and I’m faced with bailing and hoping for the best until things change. OR climbing out of the boat onto the waves and taking that step of faith “out of my comfort zone into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is.” But the “waves” in my world, the obstacles that get between me and Jesus sometimes, “call out my name and they laugh at me.”
Sometimes I just have this feeling deep down that I won’t ever win, that I’ve tried before and failed so many times. So, what makes me think this time will be any different? It depends. Who am I going to listen to?? I like to think I’m an intelligent person, but scripture warns against someone who is “wise in her own eyes.”
But the great thing is (to quote Pooh) that I get to choose whether I will listen to the gremlins in my life tell me that I will fail, that it will never work, that we can’t afford it, that the sky will fall IF. Or whether I will choose to listen to the voice of Truth… The One that tells me not to be afraid, the voice that sings over me while I sleep and tells me of His love and mercy. The same voice that prays for me even when I don’t know how to pray for myself. The same voice that raised the dead can raise me out of that boat so that I can walk toward Him in the middle of my storm.
He never promised that it would be easy, but He did promise that He would be with me. And if I keep my eyes on Him, I can step out of that boat and walk on the waves of fear and doubt, rejection and illness, toward the life He has called me to live.